And the moon grows dimmer
At the tides low ebb
And your breath comes faster
And you're aching to move
But you're caught in the web...
----------------
Nobody can tell ya
There's only one song worth singing
They may try and sell ya
Cause it hangs them up to see someone like you
But you've gotta
Make your own kind of Music
Sing your own special song
Make your own kind of Music
Even if no body else sings along
You're gonna be nowhere
The loneliest kind of lonely
It may be rough going
Just to do your thing's the hardest thing to do
Make your own kind of Music
Sing your own special song
Make your own kind of Music
Even if no body else sings along
So if you cannot take my hand
And if you must be going
I will understand
You've gotta
Make your own kind of Music
Sing your own special song
Make your own kind of Music
Even if no body else sings along
----------------
My foundations
are in the universe
my spirit is universal
despite all pressures against me
to choose sides
black or white
man or woman
gay or straight
I am still a child
and an old woman
my blood is red
my choice is not to choose
I cannot choice
I am the exception to the rule of choice
I am one and all without exception
I defy the rules
I am me.
----------------
Sweet little cherry blossom,
blooming before her time
Moving her lips to her favorite song,
cherishing every rhyme
Swaying her hips to the rhythm,
humming along with the tune
Lost in her own little dream world
Slow dancing with the moon
Watching her I cannot help,
but go back in my mind
And suddenly I find I am 15 again
Slow dancing with the moon
Oh, the stars got in my eyes long time ago
And I've lived my life like a love sick clown
In a bittersweet cartoon
Just a dreamy eyed kid
Slow dancing with the moon
Watching the girl I'm reminded
she's quite a lot like me
Trapped in the suburbs of wonderland,
lost in her own fantasy
Somehow my heart never grew up,
no one ever burst my balloon
So here I am swirling in star dust,
slow dancing with the moon
Still believe some day my wildest dreams
will all come true
And I'll find someone who'll
make me 15 again
But until then I'm
Slow dancing with the moon
Oh, the stars got in my eyes long time ago
And I've lived my life like a love sick clown
In a bittersweet cartoon
Just a dreamy eyed kid
Slow dancing with the moon
I love to think about the future. It's like being in a dream that you have control of, and no one can mess up. Thinking of the future is something that gives me the hope and strength to live in the present. When I look at the future, I simply cannot see anything but a beautiful time, more wonderful than the present. When I think of all the loving people that I see around me, all the people that just want to help others, and to create a better world for us all, it gives me immense hope for the future.
As one of my favorite singers, the great Billy Joel, said "Say goodbye to the oldies but goodies, cause the good old days aren't always so good, and tomorrow aint as bad as it seems." It seems that a lot of people have negative views of where we are and where we are heading, but I think it's important to remember how far we have come. It's easy to make the past seem like a perfect time of loving families and close communities, but we should not forget the true nature of the past. We have come very far, in gaining more freedoms for everyone, in giving people chances to make their lives more, and in simply improving the quality of life of the average person. When I think of how far we've come, I can't help but be optimistic for the future.
I think we are at a moment in time, that will change the future forever. I don't know why I think this exactly, but the feel of the world today just seems like some great change is coming. There have been many of these moments in the past: the late 1700s, late 1800's, the 1930's and 40's, just to list a few. I feel like we are at another crucial point, because people are becoming more knowledgable about how they can change the world around them, and more active in reaching their goals. You say that ignorance is the greatest enemy we face, and I completely agree, but I also think we are doing a wonderful job of fighting this enemy. Now, people seem to really care about what's going on and where we are going, more than they did just a couple of years ago. This might just be because I'm around different people, but in my perspective something is changing. With all the negative things we see in the world, I think it is important not to forget that there is good in the world as well. The only things really shown on the news seems to be all the evil things that occur, murders and robberies, and great tragedies. But much more common are the small wonders and treasures that one person gives another. Just think of how many times a day someone is saying "I love you." Think how many times someone helps out another in need. Think how many times children bring smiles to the faces of those around them. All of these things make me sure that we will have a great future. There is more good, more love in this world than there is evil and hate. It will bring us to a good end, it just takes time to get there.
I wish I was still naive. I miss thinking that people really are good, that if you work hard you'll be rewarded, that the world loves you, and so many other things. I miss thinking all my idols were perfect people. I miss thinking people really were good at heart, even if it took a while to see it. I really, really miss all these things, and wish I could make myself still believe them. Unfortunately, I've seen too much of the world, and I just can't believe it is a benevolent place with benevolent people any more. So many people don't even have a basic respect for other human beings. It's as though everyone in the world thinks the are the only real person in the world. Hell, I wish being so naive that I even though I was a good, nice person. I hate discovering how terrible of a person I really am. I used to describe myself by the song Slow Dancing with the Moon, because the essence of how you don't have to grow out of the innocence of a young girl. I've held onto this song for as long as I could, but now, I'm just fooling myself. I'm not innocent, the world isn't innocent, and it's not a kind place to be in. I just wish I could go back, everything used to be so wonderful.
Sweet little cherry blossom, blooming before her time
Moving her lips to her favorite song, cherishing every rhyme
Swaying her hips to the rhythm, humming along with the tune
Lost in her own little dream world, slow dancing with the moon
Watching her I cannot help but go back in my mind
And suddenly I find I am 15 again
Slow dancing with the moon
Oh, the stars got in my eyes long time ago
And I've lived my life like a love sick clown
In a bittersweet cartoon
Just a dreamy-eyed kid slow dancing with the moon
Watching the girl I'm reminded she's quite a lot like me
Trapped in the
suburbs of wonderland, lost in her own fantasy
Somehow my heart never grew up, no one ever burst my balloon
So here I am swirling in star dust slow dancing with the moon
Still believe someday my wildest dreams will all come true
I don't know why, but I've just been feeling real sad lately. Things in my life are going pretty good, in fact I'm exactly where I want to be, but I'm just not happy anymore. I just get so sad, and I don't understand why. Just the other day, I was at work, and for no reason I had to run to the restroom to cry. I just started crying, and I really can't figure out why. I've been doing this more and more lately, it's just that I'm simply not happy. My roomates don't understand, they think I'm hiding something from them. I keep finding myself wishing I could make up a reason that I'm so unhappy, but that just seems wrong. I don't know what's wrong with me though. Everything really is how I want it to be, yet that isn't enough. I'm doing really well in school, I just started a new job, my family has sorted though all it's problems, yet still I'm not happy. I feel horrible because so many people don't have all the things, all the opportunities, that I've had, yet I can't even be happy with what I've got. I just wish I knew why I'm so sad all the time. I just wish I new what to do to make myself happy.
